Some photos I took of Hoi An today.
F’ckn Pfffft, revenge is sweet
Went down to Flinders today for a surf, beautiful summer’s day here in Melbourne, about 27C glassy, clean, very small but loads of fun.
While taking my board off the roof I see a group of about 8 people proceed to take their diving gear down the beach. Pretty obvious what they were doing - seen similar groups down the beach raping our shores of abalone, limpits, sea urchins and anything else that’s alive all of my life. While paddling out, I spot another group of about 8 people who got the idea before the others and paddled real close to them to see their booty of abalone they were taking. Asked one of them what they were doing and informed them that it was a marine park and that what they were doing was illegal. He said “solly (sic), didn’t know”, to which I replied “don’t say sorry to me, say it to your children - when there is nothing left for them.”
After a couple of hours I return back to the beach and see the first group returning to their car. Annoyed, I said “what did you get - abalone” to which they replied “no abalone, just some fish”. Told them that it’s a marine park and that you can’t do that here and was told, as I expected, to f’ck off.
They took off in their cars and ten or so minutes later I left. I proceeding up the hill, towards Flinders and I see all these flashing lights, and guess who was camped up the top of the cliffs watching every move with binoculars - A whole F’cking squad of fisheries rangers - about 8 guys and three cars. I made a point at stopping at the scene just to eyeball the guy who told me to f’ck off 10 minutes earlier, who was now handcuffed, I looked him in the eye and just let off a cheeky gentle smirk.
Seeing groups of people, with a purpose to rape our coast has always pissed me right off. I’ve usually said something directly to them, if I felt comfortable doing so - despite knowing it falls on deaf ears.
I’ve never been against anybody fishing and enjoying some of the fruits of our ocean - I’ve done it myself for years and hope my children will also. What upsets me is that some cultural groups will impose their own dysfunctional cultural values on the rest of us.
It was really satisfying to see the fishery rangers doing what they are supposed to be doing.
Rider World
I’ve spent the best part of the past couple of weeks compiling the riders for the Big Day Out. This is something that I’ve done each year, at this time of year, for the past 18 years. So I think I’m starting to get the hang of it.
Most people I know are fascinated with celebrities and riders. After asking me if I can get tickets to the gig the next question usually is can you tell me what’s the most outrageous things people have asked for and what did [insert band name here] ask for. The answer is always: no, guinea pig milk and no.
Riders are an intrinsic part of live entertainment. The catering rider - what I look after - is only part of the overall rider which covers things, sometimes in minute detail, such as production, accommodation, transport, security and other protocols. The size of the rider usually defines the status of the artist - the more popular the band the more they get. However, I’ve found that there has been a bit of a shift lately towards - “this is what we want”, as opposed to “let’s see how much we can get away with”. In most cases, the artists who have been around for a long time, have worked out what will best work out for them on a long tour.
When looking after so many artists on a tour as large as the Big Day Out, it’s impossible to cater exactly to everyone’s requests - as you’ll see below. Compromises need to be made, and there will always something, somewhere, that stuffs up. However, being on such a large tour, we also have the resources and experience to forsee and fix problems promptly.
I see the rider as one of the few things that artists and celebrities should be able to keep private. However, in saying that, I want to share quotes from three different artists riders that I compiled this year that made me LOL.
Anonymous Band One
Xbox 360 with 4 controllers
Assortment of EA Sports Games for 360
Including Fight Night and Street fighter
40” TV
Stereo System
Inflatable bed with fresh sheets and pillows and down comforter
Medical Staff on standby near dressing room after show with Small Oxygen Tank with face mask
….
Hebrew National Hot Dogs
French Fries
Hamburgers
…
(3) Oral B toothbrushes
Colgate Total plus whitening Toothpaste
Arm and Hammer Deodarant
…
Garment Steamer, Iron, Ironing board
…
IB prophen
Tums
Tylenol
Emergen-C
Airborne
Cruel Lotion
Socks
White T-shirts, Large, Extra large and 5XL
Anonymous Band Two
You know what would be really nice? If you could make this room look less like a typical rock & roll dressing room and more sort of…. Interesting? Are you with me? Just let someone loose with a little bit of artistic flair… Er, do you know any homosexuals? And am I allowed to say that? Probably not.
Please do not display any posters relating to the current show/festival, or posters of any past shows or festivals, inside this room. No festival running orders or show times and suchlike either. Just some nice art and things to look at in a meditative kind of way. And maybe something to smash! (Just a little joke., nobody’s going to smash anything. Not deliberately, anyway.)
Sensible chairs (what does that mean? you might be asking, and to tell you the truth, I’m not sure myself. I think it means we don’t want chairs that are prone to taking stupid risks, or making silly claims without thinking them through. So, you know, sensible chairs. Chairs with a grip on reality/ feet on the floor.) Heating and/or air conditioning that works efficiently, and is suitable for the local climate and the time of year; in other words, if we were to arrive in, say, Alaska in the winter, and there was just an air conditioner, that would be a bad thing, but if there was a great big roaring open fire, with marshmallows toasting on it, that would be a good thing.
A Clothes rail with hangers A carpet would be appreciated too. Preferably on the floor. (with the chair on top)
This dressing room should contain:
• A folding, metal chair, such as this one for example.
It has to fold, so that Eric. can trap his thumb in it every night. You will recognize Eric because he has these enormous thumbs. Very handy for hitch-hiking, and for approving things, such as the folding metal chair in the dressing room.
Anonymous Band Three
Foh:
We Will be bringing our own digidesign profile.we need a multicore with 48 lines from stage to Foh.we also require 2 filthy hookers with a unlimited supply of cocaine.they must serve the gac to us periodically,off their breasts.
BACK LINE
We will be bringing with us a collection of ropey old tat which probably wont survive the first truck journey through the great australian dust bowl and a collection ratty old dopes who will require a higher standard of cocaine than Foh and certainly more hookers .
